The Most Disgusting Uncomfortable Humiliating Pregnancy Side Effect Of All Time

“Soak your bottom in a warm tub!” the books say. “Apply an ice pack!” What they don’t say is 1) putting an ice pack on your sphincter is seriously unpleasant, and 2) things are only going to get worse. Much, MUCH worse. The problem is that hemorrhoids are often brought on by having … ah, a Difficult Number Two. Of course, your entire gastrointestinal system has nearly ground to a halt in order for your fetus to more efficiently leech nutrients from your system, so pretty much every bathroom visit necessitates a fair amount of effort, which only results in more ass-balloons, and on and on it goes. Eventually, you may be desperate enough to find yourself at a drugstore in order to make the most awkward purchase of all time. There you stand, lumberingly pregnant, while a tube of Preparation H and a container of Tuck’s Medicated Pads with Soothing Witch Hazel roll sadly across the checkout counter conveyor belt. “YES, I HAVE ENGORGED ANAL TISSUE,” you may as well be shouting. “BEHOLD THE MAJESTY OF MY ASSHOLE, WHICH SURELY RESEMBLES THE NIGHTMARISH HIND END OF AN INFLAMED AFRICAN GUINEA BABOON!” Perhaps you will assume the entire Horrifying State of Affairs will improve after childbirth. Au contraire, Pierre. If you have a C-section, you will discover that your intestines will be utterly traumatized from the procedure, which involves removing all of your internal organs, setting them aflame, and briefly juggling them for the entertainment of the medical staff before returning them to your body. At least, that’s what it will feel like the first time you try and poop. Between the intestinal PTSD and the ass-corking complications brought on from narcotic pain medications, this is the soundtrack of the emotional reaction you will have every time you go to the bathroom: Embedded content: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V8Ca_edg6RE Eventually, of course, the terrible situation happening in your rectal area will improve. Which is good news, because now you must turn your attention to someone else’s butt and the contents thereof. Welcome to parenthood! Luckily, the last smears of your dignity have long been wiped away. It’s okay, you’re among friends here: were you shocked/horrified by hemmorhoids during your pregnancy?

title: “The Most Disgusting Uncomfortable Humiliating Pregnancy Side Effect Of All Time” ShowToc: true date: “2024-10-20” author: “Willie Yoakum”

“Soak your bottom in a warm tub!” the books say. “Apply an ice pack!” What they don’t say is 1) putting an ice pack on your sphincter is seriously unpleasant, and 2) things are only going to get worse. Much, MUCH worse. The problem is that hemorrhoids are often brought on by having … ah, a Difficult Number Two. Of course, your entire gastrointestinal system has nearly ground to a halt in order for your fetus to more efficiently leech nutrients from your system, so pretty much every bathroom visit necessitates a fair amount of effort, which only results in more ass-balloons, and on and on it goes. Eventually, you may be desperate enough to find yourself at a drugstore in order to make the most awkward purchase of all time. There you stand, lumberingly pregnant, while a tube of Preparation H and a container of Tuck’s Medicated Pads with Soothing Witch Hazel roll sadly across the checkout counter conveyor belt. “YES, I HAVE ENGORGED ANAL TISSUE,” you may as well be shouting. “BEHOLD THE MAJESTY OF MY ASSHOLE, WHICH SURELY RESEMBLES THE NIGHTMARISH HIND END OF AN INFLAMED AFRICAN GUINEA BABOON!” Perhaps you will assume the entire Horrifying State of Affairs will improve after childbirth. Au contraire, Pierre. If you have a C-section, you will discover that your intestines will be utterly traumatized from the procedure, which involves removing all of your internal organs, setting them aflame, and briefly juggling them for the entertainment of the medical staff before returning them to your body. At least, that’s what it will feel like the first time you try and poop. Between the intestinal PTSD and the ass-corking complications brought on from narcotic pain medications, this is the soundtrack of the emotional reaction you will have every time you go to the bathroom: Embedded content: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V8Ca_edg6RE Eventually, of course, the terrible situation happening in your rectal area will improve. Which is good news, because now you must turn your attention to someone else’s butt and the contents thereof. Welcome to parenthood! Luckily, the last smears of your dignity have long been wiped away. It’s okay, you’re among friends here: were you shocked/horrified by hemmorhoids during your pregnancy?

title: “The Most Disgusting Uncomfortable Humiliating Pregnancy Side Effect Of All Time” ShowToc: true date: “2024-08-27” author: “Dorothy Calvert”

“Soak your bottom in a warm tub!” the books say. “Apply an ice pack!” What they don’t say is 1) putting an ice pack on your sphincter is seriously unpleasant, and 2) things are only going to get worse. Much, MUCH worse. The problem is that hemorrhoids are often brought on by having … ah, a Difficult Number Two. Of course, your entire gastrointestinal system has nearly ground to a halt in order for your fetus to more efficiently leech nutrients from your system, so pretty much every bathroom visit necessitates a fair amount of effort, which only results in more ass-balloons, and on and on it goes. Eventually, you may be desperate enough to find yourself at a drugstore in order to make the most awkward purchase of all time. There you stand, lumberingly pregnant, while a tube of Preparation H and a container of Tuck’s Medicated Pads with Soothing Witch Hazel roll sadly across the checkout counter conveyor belt. “YES, I HAVE ENGORGED ANAL TISSUE,” you may as well be shouting. “BEHOLD THE MAJESTY OF MY ASSHOLE, WHICH SURELY RESEMBLES THE NIGHTMARISH HIND END OF AN INFLAMED AFRICAN GUINEA BABOON!” Perhaps you will assume the entire Horrifying State of Affairs will improve after childbirth. Au contraire, Pierre. If you have a C-section, you will discover that your intestines will be utterly traumatized from the procedure, which involves removing all of your internal organs, setting them aflame, and briefly juggling them for the entertainment of the medical staff before returning them to your body. At least, that’s what it will feel like the first time you try and poop. Between the intestinal PTSD and the ass-corking complications brought on from narcotic pain medications, this is the soundtrack of the emotional reaction you will have every time you go to the bathroom: Embedded content: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V8Ca_edg6RE Eventually, of course, the terrible situation happening in your rectal area will improve. Which is good news, because now you must turn your attention to someone else’s butt and the contents thereof. Welcome to parenthood! Luckily, the last smears of your dignity have long been wiped away. It’s okay, you’re among friends here: were you shocked/horrified by hemmorhoids during your pregnancy?

title: “The Most Disgusting Uncomfortable Humiliating Pregnancy Side Effect Of All Time” ShowToc: true date: “2024-09-10” author: “Addie Corbin”

“Soak your bottom in a warm tub!” the books say. “Apply an ice pack!” What they don’t say is 1) putting an ice pack on your sphincter is seriously unpleasant, and 2) things are only going to get worse. Much, MUCH worse. The problem is that hemorrhoids are often brought on by having … ah, a Difficult Number Two. Of course, your entire gastrointestinal system has nearly ground to a halt in order for your fetus to more efficiently leech nutrients from your system, so pretty much every bathroom visit necessitates a fair amount of effort, which only results in more ass-balloons, and on and on it goes. Eventually, you may be desperate enough to find yourself at a drugstore in order to make the most awkward purchase of all time. There you stand, lumberingly pregnant, while a tube of Preparation H and a container of Tuck’s Medicated Pads with Soothing Witch Hazel roll sadly across the checkout counter conveyor belt. “YES, I HAVE ENGORGED ANAL TISSUE,” you may as well be shouting. “BEHOLD THE MAJESTY OF MY ASSHOLE, WHICH SURELY RESEMBLES THE NIGHTMARISH HIND END OF AN INFLAMED AFRICAN GUINEA BABOON!” Perhaps you will assume the entire Horrifying State of Affairs will improve after childbirth. Au contraire, Pierre. If you have a C-section, you will discover that your intestines will be utterly traumatized from the procedure, which involves removing all of your internal organs, setting them aflame, and briefly juggling them for the entertainment of the medical staff before returning them to your body. At least, that’s what it will feel like the first time you try and poop. Between the intestinal PTSD and the ass-corking complications brought on from narcotic pain medications, this is the soundtrack of the emotional reaction you will have every time you go to the bathroom: Embedded content: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V8Ca_edg6RE Eventually, of course, the terrible situation happening in your rectal area will improve. Which is good news, because now you must turn your attention to someone else’s butt and the contents thereof. Welcome to parenthood! Luckily, the last smears of your dignity have long been wiped away. It’s okay, you’re among friends here: were you shocked/horrified by hemmorhoids during your pregnancy?

title: “The Most Disgusting Uncomfortable Humiliating Pregnancy Side Effect Of All Time” ShowToc: true date: “2024-08-27” author: “Anthony Hough”

“Soak your bottom in a warm tub!” the books say. “Apply an ice pack!” What they don’t say is 1) putting an ice pack on your sphincter is seriously unpleasant, and 2) things are only going to get worse. Much, MUCH worse. The problem is that hemorrhoids are often brought on by having … ah, a Difficult Number Two. Of course, your entire gastrointestinal system has nearly ground to a halt in order for your fetus to more efficiently leech nutrients from your system, so pretty much every bathroom visit necessitates a fair amount of effort, which only results in more ass-balloons, and on and on it goes. Eventually, you may be desperate enough to find yourself at a drugstore in order to make the most awkward purchase of all time. There you stand, lumberingly pregnant, while a tube of Preparation H and a container of Tuck’s Medicated Pads with Soothing Witch Hazel roll sadly across the checkout counter conveyor belt. “YES, I HAVE ENGORGED ANAL TISSUE,” you may as well be shouting. “BEHOLD THE MAJESTY OF MY ASSHOLE, WHICH SURELY RESEMBLES THE NIGHTMARISH HIND END OF AN INFLAMED AFRICAN GUINEA BABOON!” Perhaps you will assume the entire Horrifying State of Affairs will improve after childbirth. Au contraire, Pierre. If you have a C-section, you will discover that your intestines will be utterly traumatized from the procedure, which involves removing all of your internal organs, setting them aflame, and briefly juggling them for the entertainment of the medical staff before returning them to your body. At least, that’s what it will feel like the first time you try and poop. Between the intestinal PTSD and the ass-corking complications brought on from narcotic pain medications, this is the soundtrack of the emotional reaction you will have every time you go to the bathroom: Embedded content: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V8Ca_edg6RE Eventually, of course, the terrible situation happening in your rectal area will improve. Which is good news, because now you must turn your attention to someone else’s butt and the contents thereof. Welcome to parenthood! Luckily, the last smears of your dignity have long been wiped away. It’s okay, you’re among friends here: were you shocked/horrified by hemmorhoids during your pregnancy?

title: “The Most Disgusting Uncomfortable Humiliating Pregnancy Side Effect Of All Time” ShowToc: true date: “2024-09-06” author: “Elba Putman”

“Soak your bottom in a warm tub!” the books say. “Apply an ice pack!” What they don’t say is 1) putting an ice pack on your sphincter is seriously unpleasant, and 2) things are only going to get worse. Much, MUCH worse. The problem is that hemorrhoids are often brought on by having … ah, a Difficult Number Two. Of course, your entire gastrointestinal system has nearly ground to a halt in order for your fetus to more efficiently leech nutrients from your system, so pretty much every bathroom visit necessitates a fair amount of effort, which only results in more ass-balloons, and on and on it goes. Eventually, you may be desperate enough to find yourself at a drugstore in order to make the most awkward purchase of all time. There you stand, lumberingly pregnant, while a tube of Preparation H and a container of Tuck’s Medicated Pads with Soothing Witch Hazel roll sadly across the checkout counter conveyor belt. “YES, I HAVE ENGORGED ANAL TISSUE,” you may as well be shouting. “BEHOLD THE MAJESTY OF MY ASSHOLE, WHICH SURELY RESEMBLES THE NIGHTMARISH HIND END OF AN INFLAMED AFRICAN GUINEA BABOON!” Perhaps you will assume the entire Horrifying State of Affairs will improve after childbirth. Au contraire, Pierre. If you have a C-section, you will discover that your intestines will be utterly traumatized from the procedure, which involves removing all of your internal organs, setting them aflame, and briefly juggling them for the entertainment of the medical staff before returning them to your body. At least, that’s what it will feel like the first time you try and poop. Between the intestinal PTSD and the ass-corking complications brought on from narcotic pain medications, this is the soundtrack of the emotional reaction you will have every time you go to the bathroom: Embedded content: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V8Ca_edg6RE Eventually, of course, the terrible situation happening in your rectal area will improve. Which is good news, because now you must turn your attention to someone else’s butt and the contents thereof. Welcome to parenthood! Luckily, the last smears of your dignity have long been wiped away. It’s okay, you’re among friends here: were you shocked/horrified by hemmorhoids during your pregnancy?

title: “The Most Disgusting Uncomfortable Humiliating Pregnancy Side Effect Of All Time” ShowToc: true date: “2024-10-16” author: “Ronald Perryman”

“Soak your bottom in a warm tub!” the books say. “Apply an ice pack!” What they don’t say is 1) putting an ice pack on your sphincter is seriously unpleasant, and 2) things are only going to get worse. Much, MUCH worse. The problem is that hemorrhoids are often brought on by having … ah, a Difficult Number Two. Of course, your entire gastrointestinal system has nearly ground to a halt in order for your fetus to more efficiently leech nutrients from your system, so pretty much every bathroom visit necessitates a fair amount of effort, which only results in more ass-balloons, and on and on it goes. Eventually, you may be desperate enough to find yourself at a drugstore in order to make the most awkward purchase of all time. There you stand, lumberingly pregnant, while a tube of Preparation H and a container of Tuck’s Medicated Pads with Soothing Witch Hazel roll sadly across the checkout counter conveyor belt. “YES, I HAVE ENGORGED ANAL TISSUE,” you may as well be shouting. “BEHOLD THE MAJESTY OF MY ASSHOLE, WHICH SURELY RESEMBLES THE NIGHTMARISH HIND END OF AN INFLAMED AFRICAN GUINEA BABOON!” Perhaps you will assume the entire Horrifying State of Affairs will improve after childbirth. Au contraire, Pierre. If you have a C-section, you will discover that your intestines will be utterly traumatized from the procedure, which involves removing all of your internal organs, setting them aflame, and briefly juggling them for the entertainment of the medical staff before returning them to your body. At least, that’s what it will feel like the first time you try and poop. Between the intestinal PTSD and the ass-corking complications brought on from narcotic pain medications, this is the soundtrack of the emotional reaction you will have every time you go to the bathroom: Embedded content: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V8Ca_edg6RE Eventually, of course, the terrible situation happening in your rectal area will improve. Which is good news, because now you must turn your attention to someone else’s butt and the contents thereof. Welcome to parenthood! Luckily, the last smears of your dignity have long been wiped away. It’s okay, you’re among friends here: were you shocked/horrified by hemmorhoids during your pregnancy?

title: “The Most Disgusting Uncomfortable Humiliating Pregnancy Side Effect Of All Time” ShowToc: true date: “2024-10-08” author: “Ruth Stecker”

“Soak your bottom in a warm tub!” the books say. “Apply an ice pack!” What they don’t say is 1) putting an ice pack on your sphincter is seriously unpleasant, and 2) things are only going to get worse. Much, MUCH worse. The problem is that hemorrhoids are often brought on by having … ah, a Difficult Number Two. Of course, your entire gastrointestinal system has nearly ground to a halt in order for your fetus to more efficiently leech nutrients from your system, so pretty much every bathroom visit necessitates a fair amount of effort, which only results in more ass-balloons, and on and on it goes. Eventually, you may be desperate enough to find yourself at a drugstore in order to make the most awkward purchase of all time. There you stand, lumberingly pregnant, while a tube of Preparation H and a container of Tuck’s Medicated Pads with Soothing Witch Hazel roll sadly across the checkout counter conveyor belt. “YES, I HAVE ENGORGED ANAL TISSUE,” you may as well be shouting. “BEHOLD THE MAJESTY OF MY ASSHOLE, WHICH SURELY RESEMBLES THE NIGHTMARISH HIND END OF AN INFLAMED AFRICAN GUINEA BABOON!” Perhaps you will assume the entire Horrifying State of Affairs will improve after childbirth. Au contraire, Pierre. If you have a C-section, you will discover that your intestines will be utterly traumatized from the procedure, which involves removing all of your internal organs, setting them aflame, and briefly juggling them for the entertainment of the medical staff before returning them to your body. At least, that’s what it will feel like the first time you try and poop. Between the intestinal PTSD and the ass-corking complications brought on from narcotic pain medications, this is the soundtrack of the emotional reaction you will have every time you go to the bathroom: Embedded content: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V8Ca_edg6RE Eventually, of course, the terrible situation happening in your rectal area will improve. Which is good news, because now you must turn your attention to someone else’s butt and the contents thereof. Welcome to parenthood! Luckily, the last smears of your dignity have long been wiped away. It’s okay, you’re among friends here: were you shocked/horrified by hemmorhoids during your pregnancy?