Even when I’m in a bathing suit at the beach or in my underwear in the gym locker room, my mind immediately goes to what other people might be thinking about my body — how they might be judging or scrutinizing it. And, as body positive as I strive to be, it does bother me.
So what possessed me, then, to get up in front of room full of strangers and literally bare it all? Call it the ultimate body-positive challenge, or an experiment in not giving a shit, or even just facing my fears. I wanted to see what others saw when they looked at my body, and what better place to find out than in an art class?
The class was a mix of men and women, most of whom looked like they were above the age of 50.
“Oh, we have a new model here today!” one student said brightly as I walked past. I smiled meekly and gave her a small wave.
Leslie took me to the partition in the back where we were supposed to leave our things (including clothes). When Leslie pulled on her cover-up and I told her I didn’t know I was supposed to bring one, she lent me her spare, a black-and-bleach collared smock that buttoned in front and came down to my knees.
“I find the worst part is disrobing in the beginning, and covering back up after each pose,” Leslie said. “That unveiling, it feels the most vulnerable.”
During each break it was best to cover back up, she said. “Some models don’t — they just stay naked during the breaks, which I think is really unprofessional.” I nodded in agreement, though I didn’t know that was even an option until then.
“Who picks the poses?” I asked. Suddenly I had no idea what to do.
“You do, but sometimes Mary Jo might come around and make some slight adjustments. Try a good mix of sitting and standing ones,” Leslie said. “The one-minute ones are like a warm-up; you can really stretch and do interesting poses.”
“We like a lot of angles,” Mary Jo added. “But try to keep the poses as casual as possible.”
“OK,” I said. I would not be doing any vogue-ing, apparently.
I heard the ding of a bell.
“Next pose,” the time-keeping student said. I tried another one this time with my arm up by my ear. A minute later, the bell again. I took a different pose. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a student whispering to Mary Jo and I panicked.
Oh god, I must be failing at this, I thought. They hate me as a model. I must be the worst muse ever.
After 20 or so one-minute poses, Ellen announced the first five-minute break.
“You’re doing a good job,” she said as I put my cover-up back on. “Those were good poses.” I smiled. Leslie asked me how I was feeling.
“Good — better,” I said. “It’s not as bad as I thought.”
Leslie suggested a sitting pose to begin with, and I sat down, angled my body to the left, and draped my right arm over the back of the chair.
“Yeah, that looks good,” Leslie said. Her pose would be the same for two 20-minute intervals — the perks of being an advanced art model, I suppose.
“You know,” she added, “if your muscles get tired, try to use other muscle groups to take over at different times. You can also flex, then return to the pose. That’s OK to do.”
Leslie and I sat down with Kenny for a while, who was eating a couple of hardboiled eggs. Kenny worked for Disney for a short time, she told me. “I also worked doing caricatures in Times Square,” he added. “It could be pretty competitive.”
Leslie seemed to know everyone in the cafeteria, and greeted them each by name.
She’s been modeling now for 17 years, she said, and currently does it full time, mainly for the League.
title: “I Posed Nude For An Art Class And Now I See My Body Differently” ShowToc: true date: “2024-08-31” author: “Marlin Easter”
Even when I’m in a bathing suit at the beach or in my underwear in the gym locker room, my mind immediately goes to what other people might be thinking about my body — how they might be judging or scrutinizing it. And, as body positive as I strive to be, it does bother me.
So what possessed me, then, to get up in front of room full of strangers and literally bare it all? Call it the ultimate body-positive challenge, or an experiment in not giving a shit, or even just facing my fears. I wanted to see what others saw when they looked at my body, and what better place to find out than in an art class?
The class was a mix of men and women, most of whom looked like they were above the age of 50.
“Oh, we have a new model here today!” one student said brightly as I walked past. I smiled meekly and gave her a small wave.
Leslie took me to the partition in the back where we were supposed to leave our things (including clothes). When Leslie pulled on her cover-up and I told her I didn’t know I was supposed to bring one, she lent me her spare, a black-and-bleach collared smock that buttoned in front and came down to my knees.
“I find the worst part is disrobing in the beginning, and covering back up after each pose,” Leslie said. “That unveiling, it feels the most vulnerable.”
During each break it was best to cover back up, she said. “Some models don’t — they just stay naked during the breaks, which I think is really unprofessional.” I nodded in agreement, though I didn’t know that was even an option until then.
“Who picks the poses?” I asked. Suddenly I had no idea what to do.
“You do, but sometimes Mary Jo might come around and make some slight adjustments. Try a good mix of sitting and standing ones,” Leslie said. “The one-minute ones are like a warm-up; you can really stretch and do interesting poses.”
“We like a lot of angles,” Mary Jo added. “But try to keep the poses as casual as possible.”
“OK,” I said. I would not be doing any vogue-ing, apparently.
I heard the ding of a bell.
“Next pose,” the time-keeping student said. I tried another one this time with my arm up by my ear. A minute later, the bell again. I took a different pose. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a student whispering to Mary Jo and I panicked.
Oh god, I must be failing at this, I thought. They hate me as a model. I must be the worst muse ever.
After 20 or so one-minute poses, Ellen announced the first five-minute break.
“You’re doing a good job,” she said as I put my cover-up back on. “Those were good poses.” I smiled. Leslie asked me how I was feeling.
“Good — better,” I said. “It’s not as bad as I thought.”
Leslie suggested a sitting pose to begin with, and I sat down, angled my body to the left, and draped my right arm over the back of the chair.
“Yeah, that looks good,” Leslie said. Her pose would be the same for two 20-minute intervals — the perks of being an advanced art model, I suppose.
“You know,” she added, “if your muscles get tired, try to use other muscle groups to take over at different times. You can also flex, then return to the pose. That’s OK to do.”
Leslie and I sat down with Kenny for a while, who was eating a couple of hardboiled eggs. Kenny worked for Disney for a short time, she told me. “I also worked doing caricatures in Times Square,” he added. “It could be pretty competitive.”
Leslie seemed to know everyone in the cafeteria, and greeted them each by name.
She’s been modeling now for 17 years, she said, and currently does it full time, mainly for the League.
title: “I Posed Nude For An Art Class And Now I See My Body Differently” ShowToc: true date: “2024-09-14” author: “Muriel Grisby”
Even when I’m in a bathing suit at the beach or in my underwear in the gym locker room, my mind immediately goes to what other people might be thinking about my body — how they might be judging or scrutinizing it. And, as body positive as I strive to be, it does bother me.
So what possessed me, then, to get up in front of room full of strangers and literally bare it all? Call it the ultimate body-positive challenge, or an experiment in not giving a shit, or even just facing my fears. I wanted to see what others saw when they looked at my body, and what better place to find out than in an art class?
The class was a mix of men and women, most of whom looked like they were above the age of 50.
“Oh, we have a new model here today!” one student said brightly as I walked past. I smiled meekly and gave her a small wave.
Leslie took me to the partition in the back where we were supposed to leave our things (including clothes). When Leslie pulled on her cover-up and I told her I didn’t know I was supposed to bring one, she lent me her spare, a black-and-bleach collared smock that buttoned in front and came down to my knees.
“I find the worst part is disrobing in the beginning, and covering back up after each pose,” Leslie said. “That unveiling, it feels the most vulnerable.”
During each break it was best to cover back up, she said. “Some models don’t — they just stay naked during the breaks, which I think is really unprofessional.” I nodded in agreement, though I didn’t know that was even an option until then.
“Who picks the poses?” I asked. Suddenly I had no idea what to do.
“You do, but sometimes Mary Jo might come around and make some slight adjustments. Try a good mix of sitting and standing ones,” Leslie said. “The one-minute ones are like a warm-up; you can really stretch and do interesting poses.”
“We like a lot of angles,” Mary Jo added. “But try to keep the poses as casual as possible.”
“OK,” I said. I would not be doing any vogue-ing, apparently.
I heard the ding of a bell.
“Next pose,” the time-keeping student said. I tried another one this time with my arm up by my ear. A minute later, the bell again. I took a different pose. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a student whispering to Mary Jo and I panicked.
Oh god, I must be failing at this, I thought. They hate me as a model. I must be the worst muse ever.
After 20 or so one-minute poses, Ellen announced the first five-minute break.
“You’re doing a good job,” she said as I put my cover-up back on. “Those were good poses.” I smiled. Leslie asked me how I was feeling.
“Good — better,” I said. “It’s not as bad as I thought.”
Leslie suggested a sitting pose to begin with, and I sat down, angled my body to the left, and draped my right arm over the back of the chair.
“Yeah, that looks good,” Leslie said. Her pose would be the same for two 20-minute intervals — the perks of being an advanced art model, I suppose.
“You know,” she added, “if your muscles get tired, try to use other muscle groups to take over at different times. You can also flex, then return to the pose. That’s OK to do.”
Leslie and I sat down with Kenny for a while, who was eating a couple of hardboiled eggs. Kenny worked for Disney for a short time, she told me. “I also worked doing caricatures in Times Square,” he added. “It could be pretty competitive.”
Leslie seemed to know everyone in the cafeteria, and greeted them each by name.
She’s been modeling now for 17 years, she said, and currently does it full time, mainly for the League.
