He Wants More Babies But I M Done 10 Couples Who Disagree On Family Size

Generally speaking, I’m fine with our family’s being complete. But I’d be lying if I didn’t confess that there are times when I could imagine adding just one more little person to the mix. I suspect that if I had a spouse who was open to it, I’d be pretty easily persuaded to get pregnant again.  But he isn’t, so we’re done.  The interesting thing about the whole “are we done with kids” conversation is that this is one of the few marital conversations where compromise really isn’t an option. You either have another child or you don’t, so if you have two partners in different places on this issue, someone is going to have to end up disappointed.  I talked to 10 moms who’ve dealt with not being in agreement with their partners about adding another kid to the family to find out how they navigated this super important but really tricky situation. Read on for some very candid reflections of how the thought of another baby changed, and in once case ENDED, some marriages. “But I HATE being pregnant. I had gestational diabetes last time and was sick a lot. Delivery of my giant baby was hard and recovery was long. We have two kids now and I’m DONE being pregnant. He is really pushing for two more but thinks adoption would be ‘cheating’ because I can get pregnant — I just don’t want to. “Right now we are tabling the conversation because it only leads to fights and we’ve got enough on our plates with two kids under 4 years old. I’m hoping I can wait him out.” — J.J. “I’m still nursing and we JUST started sleeping through the night last week, which has been so wonderful! A few major factors for me: If my partner says no, that’s pretty much the answer. For such an unknown, I really don’t want to have it become a huge issue between us, especially when I am not really ready. Also, it took more than a year and a surgery to get my miracle baby, and I am a very happy, lucky mama to have him. If he’s my only child, I know I can live with that. “I often think about the sibling factor, and we are really lucky to have lots of cousins in the same age group that we see a lot. My husband says, ‘If we were younger and richer, it may be different,’ and I can totally see that. Money is a factor. Age may be a factor. The world and the state of madness we’re in is a factor. “I never knew I’d be so happy to have a child, and I can see being happy with more, but nothing can change the fact that the light and love of my life brings me so much joy. “And I always think, ‘I never know what life will bring.’ Another child can be on the way in more than one way, if it’s meant to be.” — M.M. “I’m 37, so we need to decide this issue pretty soon.” — H.R. “I say that love multiplies and that you love each kid enough and differently. “We’re pretty stuck on this question, actually. I low-key hope for an ‘accident’ that would force our hand and decide for us.” — P.Y. More from CafeMom: Quiz: How Many Kids Can You Handle “Fast-forward seven years, he’s so happy as a dad to our 3-year-old, and would have been thrilled to stop at one child. I always wanted a big family, but respect that for him two is a stretch. So two it is (second due in May).” — E.S. “So for now, we have agreed to enjoy the three amazing, insane little beings that we have and we’ll come back to it once the baby is in school.” — E.L. “I’m pregnant now and it feels weird and unnatural. I never want to do this to my body again. I’m 99 percent sure I’m one and done. I think we’ll have some more fights about this in the future.” — S.F. “So far she hasn’t been willing to do that, so we’re kind of in limbo about it. I’m just waiting to see if her desire to have another is stronger than her lack of interest in being pregnant.” — N.K.  More from CafeMom: 12 Things Never to Say to LGBTQ Families (Seriously, Stop it…) “Right now with us both [working] full-time and in demanding positions, it’s a lot having two, and both [are] still at pretty dependent ages. But I’m not willing to say we are done just yet.” — R.W. “Right now I want to get divorced, find someone who treats me better, and have some more babies.” — M.E.

title: " He Wants More Babies But I M Done 10 Couples Who Disagree On Family Size” ShowToc: true date: “2024-08-26” author: “Shane Gove”

Generally speaking, I’m fine with our family’s being complete. But I’d be lying if I didn’t confess that there are times when I could imagine adding just one more little person to the mix. I suspect that if I had a spouse who was open to it, I’d be pretty easily persuaded to get pregnant again.  But he isn’t, so we’re done.  The interesting thing about the whole “are we done with kids” conversation is that this is one of the few marital conversations where compromise really isn’t an option. You either have another child or you don’t, so if you have two partners in different places on this issue, someone is going to have to end up disappointed.  I talked to 10 moms who’ve dealt with not being in agreement with their partners about adding another kid to the family to find out how they navigated this super important but really tricky situation. Read on for some very candid reflections of how the thought of another baby changed, and in once case ENDED, some marriages. “But I HATE being pregnant. I had gestational diabetes last time and was sick a lot. Delivery of my giant baby was hard and recovery was long. We have two kids now and I’m DONE being pregnant. He is really pushing for two more but thinks adoption would be ‘cheating’ because I can get pregnant — I just don’t want to. “Right now we are tabling the conversation because it only leads to fights and we’ve got enough on our plates with two kids under 4 years old. I’m hoping I can wait him out.” — J.J. “I’m still nursing and we JUST started sleeping through the night last week, which has been so wonderful! A few major factors for me: If my partner says no, that’s pretty much the answer. For such an unknown, I really don’t want to have it become a huge issue between us, especially when I am not really ready. Also, it took more than a year and a surgery to get my miracle baby, and I am a very happy, lucky mama to have him. If he’s my only child, I know I can live with that. “I often think about the sibling factor, and we are really lucky to have lots of cousins in the same age group that we see a lot. My husband says, ‘If we were younger and richer, it may be different,’ and I can totally see that. Money is a factor. Age may be a factor. The world and the state of madness we’re in is a factor. “I never knew I’d be so happy to have a child, and I can see being happy with more, but nothing can change the fact that the light and love of my life brings me so much joy. “And I always think, ‘I never know what life will bring.’ Another child can be on the way in more than one way, if it’s meant to be.” — M.M. “I’m 37, so we need to decide this issue pretty soon.” — H.R. “I say that love multiplies and that you love each kid enough and differently. “We’re pretty stuck on this question, actually. I low-key hope for an ‘accident’ that would force our hand and decide for us.” — P.Y. More from CafeMom: Quiz: How Many Kids Can You Handle “Fast-forward seven years, he’s so happy as a dad to our 3-year-old, and would have been thrilled to stop at one child. I always wanted a big family, but respect that for him two is a stretch. So two it is (second due in May).” — E.S. “So for now, we have agreed to enjoy the three amazing, insane little beings that we have and we’ll come back to it once the baby is in school.” — E.L. “I’m pregnant now and it feels weird and unnatural. I never want to do this to my body again. I’m 99 percent sure I’m one and done. I think we’ll have some more fights about this in the future.” — S.F. “So far she hasn’t been willing to do that, so we’re kind of in limbo about it. I’m just waiting to see if her desire to have another is stronger than her lack of interest in being pregnant.” — N.K.  More from CafeMom: 12 Things Never to Say to LGBTQ Families (Seriously, Stop it…) “Right now with us both [working] full-time and in demanding positions, it’s a lot having two, and both [are] still at pretty dependent ages. But I’m not willing to say we are done just yet.” — R.W. “Right now I want to get divorced, find someone who treats me better, and have some more babies.” — M.E.

title: " He Wants More Babies But I M Done 10 Couples Who Disagree On Family Size” ShowToc: true date: “2024-09-03” author: “Elizabeth Butera”

Generally speaking, I’m fine with our family’s being complete. But I’d be lying if I didn’t confess that there are times when I could imagine adding just one more little person to the mix. I suspect that if I had a spouse who was open to it, I’d be pretty easily persuaded to get pregnant again.  But he isn’t, so we’re done.  The interesting thing about the whole “are we done with kids” conversation is that this is one of the few marital conversations where compromise really isn’t an option. You either have another child or you don’t, so if you have two partners in different places on this issue, someone is going to have to end up disappointed.  I talked to 10 moms who’ve dealt with not being in agreement with their partners about adding another kid to the family to find out how they navigated this super important but really tricky situation. Read on for some very candid reflections of how the thought of another baby changed, and in once case ENDED, some marriages. “But I HATE being pregnant. I had gestational diabetes last time and was sick a lot. Delivery of my giant baby was hard and recovery was long. We have two kids now and I’m DONE being pregnant. He is really pushing for two more but thinks adoption would be ‘cheating’ because I can get pregnant — I just don’t want to. “Right now we are tabling the conversation because it only leads to fights and we’ve got enough on our plates with two kids under 4 years old. I’m hoping I can wait him out.” — J.J. “I’m still nursing and we JUST started sleeping through the night last week, which has been so wonderful! A few major factors for me: If my partner says no, that’s pretty much the answer. For such an unknown, I really don’t want to have it become a huge issue between us, especially when I am not really ready. Also, it took more than a year and a surgery to get my miracle baby, and I am a very happy, lucky mama to have him. If he’s my only child, I know I can live with that. “I often think about the sibling factor, and we are really lucky to have lots of cousins in the same age group that we see a lot. My husband says, ‘If we were younger and richer, it may be different,’ and I can totally see that. Money is a factor. Age may be a factor. The world and the state of madness we’re in is a factor. “I never knew I’d be so happy to have a child, and I can see being happy with more, but nothing can change the fact that the light and love of my life brings me so much joy. “And I always think, ‘I never know what life will bring.’ Another child can be on the way in more than one way, if it’s meant to be.” — M.M. “I’m 37, so we need to decide this issue pretty soon.” — H.R. “I say that love multiplies and that you love each kid enough and differently. “We’re pretty stuck on this question, actually. I low-key hope for an ‘accident’ that would force our hand and decide for us.” — P.Y. More from CafeMom: Quiz: How Many Kids Can You Handle “Fast-forward seven years, he’s so happy as a dad to our 3-year-old, and would have been thrilled to stop at one child. I always wanted a big family, but respect that for him two is a stretch. So two it is (second due in May).” — E.S. “So for now, we have agreed to enjoy the three amazing, insane little beings that we have and we’ll come back to it once the baby is in school.” — E.L. “I’m pregnant now and it feels weird and unnatural. I never want to do this to my body again. I’m 99 percent sure I’m one and done. I think we’ll have some more fights about this in the future.” — S.F. “So far she hasn’t been willing to do that, so we’re kind of in limbo about it. I’m just waiting to see if her desire to have another is stronger than her lack of interest in being pregnant.” — N.K.  More from CafeMom: 12 Things Never to Say to LGBTQ Families (Seriously, Stop it…) “Right now with us both [working] full-time and in demanding positions, it’s a lot having two, and both [are] still at pretty dependent ages. But I’m not willing to say we are done just yet.” — R.W. “Right now I want to get divorced, find someone who treats me better, and have some more babies.” — M.E.