20 Confessions That Show The Dark Side Of Motherhood
<span title='2024-10-03 00:00:00 +0000 UTC'>October 3, 2024</span> · 16 min · 3217 words · Glenn Thomas
My kids are getting on my nerves so badly that I wish I could open my closet and escape to Narnia.
Some days, the greatest sign of my love for my family is that I refrain from strangling them.
I bought my 9-month-old a pair of yoga pants. Apparently neither one of us plans on ever joining polite society again.
I eat ice cream out of coffee mugs so that the kids won’t notice and I won’t have to share.
Saw a loaf of bread sold at nearly $6 today, and I suddenly felt really really inspired to learn how to bake my own bread at home. And then I laughed and laughed and laughed like a crazy woman, right there in the bread aisle.
My 1-year-old was licking something sticky off the floor. Instead of stopping her, I let her continue because lunch wasn’t quite finished and it was keeping her occupied.
Why, yes, I did just cuss at my 6-month-old, but he started it by getting up at 4 a.m. for the morning.
My son likes to show his toys to his penis. I think it’s his best friend. I found myself thinking this morning, “I wish I had that kind of relationship with my vagina.” I think I need a hobby.
I think I got carpal tunnel from Candy Crush.
I pretend to feel bad when my toddler prefers daddy. But secretly, I’m relieved. I like the break.
Currently covered in pee. About to give myself a baby wipe bath. Oh the joys of motherhood.
My kids all sleep in their underwear because no pajamas means that much less laundry for me to wash and fold.
I knew I needed a break when my 2-year-old son threw an empty 5-gallon water jug at me and I could so easily envision myself picking up the jug and chucking it back at him as hard as I could!
Inspector Gadget would be super impressed with how far my boobs stretch. If only I could use them to fight crime.
I mentally tell my 13-year-old to go fuck herself at least 20 times a day.
To hell with tea or coffee, I can’t start the day without my vibrator.
I can ruin an entire week of exercising and eating well with one day of PMS and access to chocolate.
Nothing makes me happier than a $4 bottle of Pinot Grigio.
I sucked breast milk from my own nipple. Just wanted to see what all the fuss was about.
The dog pees to mark and claim his territory. I use Cajun spices and hot sauce to mark and claim mine.
Got a confession of your own?
title: “20 Confessions That Show The Dark Side Of Motherhood”
ShowToc: true
date: “2024-09-15”
author: “Jonathan Rowan”
My kids are getting on my nerves so badly that I wish I could open my closet and escape to Narnia.
Some days, the greatest sign of my love for my family is that I refrain from strangling them.
I bought my 9-month-old a pair of yoga pants. Apparently neither one of us plans on ever joining polite society again.
I eat ice cream out of coffee mugs so that the kids won’t notice and I won’t have to share.
Saw a loaf of bread sold at nearly $6 today, and I suddenly felt really really inspired to learn how to bake my own bread at home. And then I laughed and laughed and laughed like a crazy woman, right there in the bread aisle.
My 1-year-old was licking something sticky off the floor. Instead of stopping her, I let her continue because lunch wasn’t quite finished and it was keeping her occupied.
Why, yes, I did just cuss at my 6-month-old, but he started it by getting up at 4 a.m. for the morning.
My son likes to show his toys to his penis. I think it’s his best friend. I found myself thinking this morning, “I wish I had that kind of relationship with my vagina.” I think I need a hobby.
I think I got carpal tunnel from Candy Crush.
I pretend to feel bad when my toddler prefers daddy. But secretly, I’m relieved. I like the break.
Currently covered in pee. About to give myself a baby wipe bath. Oh the joys of motherhood.
My kids all sleep in their underwear because no pajamas means that much less laundry for me to wash and fold.
I knew I needed a break when my 2-year-old son threw an empty 5-gallon water jug at me and I could so easily envision myself picking up the jug and chucking it back at him as hard as I could!
Inspector Gadget would be super impressed with how far my boobs stretch. If only I could use them to fight crime.
I mentally tell my 13-year-old to go fuck herself at least 20 times a day.
To hell with tea or coffee, I can’t start the day without my vibrator.
I can ruin an entire week of exercising and eating well with one day of PMS and access to chocolate.
Nothing makes me happier than a $4 bottle of Pinot Grigio.
I sucked breast milk from my own nipple. Just wanted to see what all the fuss was about.
The dog pees to mark and claim his territory. I use Cajun spices and hot sauce to mark and claim mine.
Got a confession of your own?
title: “20 Confessions That Show The Dark Side Of Motherhood”
ShowToc: true
date: “2024-09-06”
author: “Shelly Wilder”
My kids are getting on my nerves so badly that I wish I could open my closet and escape to Narnia.
Some days, the greatest sign of my love for my family is that I refrain from strangling them.
I bought my 9-month-old a pair of yoga pants. Apparently neither one of us plans on ever joining polite society again.
I eat ice cream out of coffee mugs so that the kids won’t notice and I won’t have to share.
Saw a loaf of bread sold at nearly $6 today, and I suddenly felt really really inspired to learn how to bake my own bread at home. And then I laughed and laughed and laughed like a crazy woman, right there in the bread aisle.
My 1-year-old was licking something sticky off the floor. Instead of stopping her, I let her continue because lunch wasn’t quite finished and it was keeping her occupied.
Why, yes, I did just cuss at my 6-month-old, but he started it by getting up at 4 a.m. for the morning.
My son likes to show his toys to his penis. I think it’s his best friend. I found myself thinking this morning, “I wish I had that kind of relationship with my vagina.” I think I need a hobby.
I think I got carpal tunnel from Candy Crush.
I pretend to feel bad when my toddler prefers daddy. But secretly, I’m relieved. I like the break.
Currently covered in pee. About to give myself a baby wipe bath. Oh the joys of motherhood.
My kids all sleep in their underwear because no pajamas means that much less laundry for me to wash and fold.
I knew I needed a break when my 2-year-old son threw an empty 5-gallon water jug at me and I could so easily envision myself picking up the jug and chucking it back at him as hard as I could!
Inspector Gadget would be super impressed with how far my boobs stretch. If only I could use them to fight crime.
I mentally tell my 13-year-old to go fuck herself at least 20 times a day.
To hell with tea or coffee, I can’t start the day without my vibrator.
I can ruin an entire week of exercising and eating well with one day of PMS and access to chocolate.
Nothing makes me happier than a $4 bottle of Pinot Grigio.
I sucked breast milk from my own nipple. Just wanted to see what all the fuss was about.
The dog pees to mark and claim his territory. I use Cajun spices and hot sauce to mark and claim mine.
Got a confession of your own?
title: “20 Confessions That Show The Dark Side Of Motherhood”
ShowToc: true
date: “2024-09-21”
author: “Dustin Uppencamp”
My kids are getting on my nerves so badly that I wish I could open my closet and escape to Narnia.
Some days, the greatest sign of my love for my family is that I refrain from strangling them.
I bought my 9-month-old a pair of yoga pants. Apparently neither one of us plans on ever joining polite society again.
I eat ice cream out of coffee mugs so that the kids won’t notice and I won’t have to share.
Saw a loaf of bread sold at nearly $6 today, and I suddenly felt really really inspired to learn how to bake my own bread at home. And then I laughed and laughed and laughed like a crazy woman, right there in the bread aisle.
My 1-year-old was licking something sticky off the floor. Instead of stopping her, I let her continue because lunch wasn’t quite finished and it was keeping her occupied.
Why, yes, I did just cuss at my 6-month-old, but he started it by getting up at 4 a.m. for the morning.
My son likes to show his toys to his penis. I think it’s his best friend. I found myself thinking this morning, “I wish I had that kind of relationship with my vagina.” I think I need a hobby.
I think I got carpal tunnel from Candy Crush.
I pretend to feel bad when my toddler prefers daddy. But secretly, I’m relieved. I like the break.
Currently covered in pee. About to give myself a baby wipe bath. Oh the joys of motherhood.
My kids all sleep in their underwear because no pajamas means that much less laundry for me to wash and fold.
I knew I needed a break when my 2-year-old son threw an empty 5-gallon water jug at me and I could so easily envision myself picking up the jug and chucking it back at him as hard as I could!
Inspector Gadget would be super impressed with how far my boobs stretch. If only I could use them to fight crime.
I mentally tell my 13-year-old to go fuck herself at least 20 times a day.
To hell with tea or coffee, I can’t start the day without my vibrator.
I can ruin an entire week of exercising and eating well with one day of PMS and access to chocolate.
Nothing makes me happier than a $4 bottle of Pinot Grigio.
I sucked breast milk from my own nipple. Just wanted to see what all the fuss was about.
The dog pees to mark and claim his territory. I use Cajun spices and hot sauce to mark and claim mine.
Got a confession of your own?
title: “20 Confessions That Show The Dark Side Of Motherhood”
ShowToc: true
date: “2024-09-20”
author: “Diana Gordon”
My kids are getting on my nerves so badly that I wish I could open my closet and escape to Narnia.
Some days, the greatest sign of my love for my family is that I refrain from strangling them.
I bought my 9-month-old a pair of yoga pants. Apparently neither one of us plans on ever joining polite society again.
I eat ice cream out of coffee mugs so that the kids won’t notice and I won’t have to share.
Saw a loaf of bread sold at nearly $6 today, and I suddenly felt really really inspired to learn how to bake my own bread at home. And then I laughed and laughed and laughed like a crazy woman, right there in the bread aisle.
My 1-year-old was licking something sticky off the floor. Instead of stopping her, I let her continue because lunch wasn’t quite finished and it was keeping her occupied.
Why, yes, I did just cuss at my 6-month-old, but he started it by getting up at 4 a.m. for the morning.
My son likes to show his toys to his penis. I think it’s his best friend. I found myself thinking this morning, “I wish I had that kind of relationship with my vagina.” I think I need a hobby.
I think I got carpal tunnel from Candy Crush.
I pretend to feel bad when my toddler prefers daddy. But secretly, I’m relieved. I like the break.
Currently covered in pee. About to give myself a baby wipe bath. Oh the joys of motherhood.
My kids all sleep in their underwear because no pajamas means that much less laundry for me to wash and fold.
I knew I needed a break when my 2-year-old son threw an empty 5-gallon water jug at me and I could so easily envision myself picking up the jug and chucking it back at him as hard as I could!
Inspector Gadget would be super impressed with how far my boobs stretch. If only I could use them to fight crime.
I mentally tell my 13-year-old to go fuck herself at least 20 times a day.
To hell with tea or coffee, I can’t start the day without my vibrator.
I can ruin an entire week of exercising and eating well with one day of PMS and access to chocolate.
Nothing makes me happier than a $4 bottle of Pinot Grigio.
I sucked breast milk from my own nipple. Just wanted to see what all the fuss was about.
The dog pees to mark and claim his territory. I use Cajun spices and hot sauce to mark and claim mine.
Got a confession of your own?
title: “20 Confessions That Show The Dark Side Of Motherhood”
ShowToc: true
date: “2024-09-30”
author: “Dennis Henderson”
My kids are getting on my nerves so badly that I wish I could open my closet and escape to Narnia.
Some days, the greatest sign of my love for my family is that I refrain from strangling them.
I bought my 9-month-old a pair of yoga pants. Apparently neither one of us plans on ever joining polite society again.
I eat ice cream out of coffee mugs so that the kids won’t notice and I won’t have to share.
Saw a loaf of bread sold at nearly $6 today, and I suddenly felt really really inspired to learn how to bake my own bread at home. And then I laughed and laughed and laughed like a crazy woman, right there in the bread aisle.
My 1-year-old was licking something sticky off the floor. Instead of stopping her, I let her continue because lunch wasn’t quite finished and it was keeping her occupied.
Why, yes, I did just cuss at my 6-month-old, but he started it by getting up at 4 a.m. for the morning.
My son likes to show his toys to his penis. I think it’s his best friend. I found myself thinking this morning, “I wish I had that kind of relationship with my vagina.” I think I need a hobby.
I think I got carpal tunnel from Candy Crush.
I pretend to feel bad when my toddler prefers daddy. But secretly, I’m relieved. I like the break.
Currently covered in pee. About to give myself a baby wipe bath. Oh the joys of motherhood.
My kids all sleep in their underwear because no pajamas means that much less laundry for me to wash and fold.
I knew I needed a break when my 2-year-old son threw an empty 5-gallon water jug at me and I could so easily envision myself picking up the jug and chucking it back at him as hard as I could!
Inspector Gadget would be super impressed with how far my boobs stretch. If only I could use them to fight crime.
I mentally tell my 13-year-old to go fuck herself at least 20 times a day.
To hell with tea or coffee, I can’t start the day without my vibrator.
I can ruin an entire week of exercising and eating well with one day of PMS and access to chocolate.
Nothing makes me happier than a $4 bottle of Pinot Grigio.
I sucked breast milk from my own nipple. Just wanted to see what all the fuss was about.
The dog pees to mark and claim his territory. I use Cajun spices and hot sauce to mark and claim mine.
Got a confession of your own?
title: “20 Confessions That Show The Dark Side Of Motherhood”
ShowToc: true
date: “2024-09-01”
author: “Maria Arnett”
My kids are getting on my nerves so badly that I wish I could open my closet and escape to Narnia.
Some days, the greatest sign of my love for my family is that I refrain from strangling them.
I bought my 9-month-old a pair of yoga pants. Apparently neither one of us plans on ever joining polite society again.
I eat ice cream out of coffee mugs so that the kids won’t notice and I won’t have to share.
Saw a loaf of bread sold at nearly $6 today, and I suddenly felt really really inspired to learn how to bake my own bread at home. And then I laughed and laughed and laughed like a crazy woman, right there in the bread aisle.
My 1-year-old was licking something sticky off the floor. Instead of stopping her, I let her continue because lunch wasn’t quite finished and it was keeping her occupied.
Why, yes, I did just cuss at my 6-month-old, but he started it by getting up at 4 a.m. for the morning.
My son likes to show his toys to his penis. I think it’s his best friend. I found myself thinking this morning, “I wish I had that kind of relationship with my vagina.” I think I need a hobby.
I think I got carpal tunnel from Candy Crush.
I pretend to feel bad when my toddler prefers daddy. But secretly, I’m relieved. I like the break.
Currently covered in pee. About to give myself a baby wipe bath. Oh the joys of motherhood.
My kids all sleep in their underwear because no pajamas means that much less laundry for me to wash and fold.
I knew I needed a break when my 2-year-old son threw an empty 5-gallon water jug at me and I could so easily envision myself picking up the jug and chucking it back at him as hard as I could!
Inspector Gadget would be super impressed with how far my boobs stretch. If only I could use them to fight crime.
I mentally tell my 13-year-old to go fuck herself at least 20 times a day.
To hell with tea or coffee, I can’t start the day without my vibrator.
I can ruin an entire week of exercising and eating well with one day of PMS and access to chocolate.
Nothing makes me happier than a $4 bottle of Pinot Grigio.
I sucked breast milk from my own nipple. Just wanted to see what all the fuss was about.
The dog pees to mark and claim his territory. I use Cajun spices and hot sauce to mark and claim mine.
Got a confession of your own?
