This week a Reddit user anonymously revealed her first experience at the gynecologist, at age 14. The woman, who goes by carlinha1289, says she visited the doctor to ask about a burning sensation she was experiencing. She knew it could be a sign of an STD, and wanted testing. Instead, she left the office in tears.
“I skipped school to go to my appointment and when I met the doctor I grabbed all the courage I could and answers his questions honestly,” she recounted. “‘I am 14, yes I am sexually active, no I do not use birth control, yes we do have unprotected sex.’"
That’s when the doctor gave her a stern look, and a rebuke she would never forget.
Carlinha says she ran out of the office crying, and did not return to a gynecologist for 7 years.
iStock
Stories like Carlinha’s are more than just cringe-worthy horror stories: they are deterrents for women seeking crucial health care.
Studies show that women — especially young women — use gynecologists for a variety of necessary functions. One study found a large percentage of teens use their OBGYN as a reproductive specialist, general practitioner, and even mental health counselor. An emotional connection with their gynecologist is proven to keep women coming back for these essential services.
But unfortunately, negative experiences like Carlinha’s are far too common. One survey conducted in Turkey found more than 80% of women felt emotional discomfort after a gynecological examination. The problem is even more prominent for LGBTQ women, many of whom believe that revealing their sexual orientation would hinder their care.
The most common words used to describe treatment for LGBTQ women were “adequate,” “variable,” and “poor.”
Revelist asked women about their own worst experiences at the gynecologist, from the strange to the down-right horrifying. Their answers revealed a concerning trend of doctors shaming their patients, for everything from their weight to their sexual history.
Revelist has reached out to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists for comment.
Below, see what the women had to say:
Welp she stopped what she was doing, turned, took off her glasses and looked me up and down and said ‘You’re not serious are you?’
I just stared at her and then she grabbed her stuff and left. I never felt so small in my life. After the appointment with the actual doc she wrote me a script for birth control and then she told my stepmom ‘because she should know what I was actually up to.’”
Well, I had a lot of anxiety that manifested as pain and tightness during the appointment. It wasn’t totally unexpected — in the past I had been unable to use tampons, and actually was never able to use them/basically have anything inserted until after I became sexually active. My body just needed to get used to that whole deal.
Anyway, the gynecologist clearly didn’t believe me and thought I was being a drama queen when she tried to do the initial part with her fingers and I told her it hurt and that I physically could not ‘relax’ enough for her to get more than her fingertip in. S__he ended the appointment there, in a massive huff, and said — and I quote —__ ‘Well, I’ll write you a birth control prescription, but I have no idea how you’re going to have sex.’
Yeah… very professional and comforting. I cried the whole way home.”
title: “13 Awful Gyno Shaming Stories That Are All Too Relatable” ShowToc: true date: “2024-08-26” author: “Samuel Westbrooks”
This week a Reddit user anonymously revealed her first experience at the gynecologist, at age 14. The woman, who goes by carlinha1289, says she visited the doctor to ask about a burning sensation she was experiencing. She knew it could be a sign of an STD, and wanted testing. Instead, she left the office in tears.
“I skipped school to go to my appointment and when I met the doctor I grabbed all the courage I could and answers his questions honestly,” she recounted. “‘I am 14, yes I am sexually active, no I do not use birth control, yes we do have unprotected sex.’"
That’s when the doctor gave her a stern look, and a rebuke she would never forget.
Carlinha says she ran out of the office crying, and did not return to a gynecologist for 7 years.
iStock
Stories like Carlinha’s are more than just cringe-worthy horror stories: they are deterrents for women seeking crucial health care.
Studies show that women — especially young women — use gynecologists for a variety of necessary functions. One study found a large percentage of teens use their OBGYN as a reproductive specialist, general practitioner, and even mental health counselor. An emotional connection with their gynecologist is proven to keep women coming back for these essential services.
But unfortunately, negative experiences like Carlinha’s are far too common. One survey conducted in Turkey found more than 80% of women felt emotional discomfort after a gynecological examination. The problem is even more prominent for LGBTQ women, many of whom believe that revealing their sexual orientation would hinder their care.
The most common words used to describe treatment for LGBTQ women were “adequate,” “variable,” and “poor.”
Revelist asked women about their own worst experiences at the gynecologist, from the strange to the down-right horrifying. Their answers revealed a concerning trend of doctors shaming their patients, for everything from their weight to their sexual history.
Revelist has reached out to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists for comment.
Below, see what the women had to say:
Welp she stopped what she was doing, turned, took off her glasses and looked me up and down and said ‘You’re not serious are you?’
I just stared at her and then she grabbed her stuff and left. I never felt so small in my life. After the appointment with the actual doc she wrote me a script for birth control and then she told my stepmom ‘because she should know what I was actually up to.’”
Well, I had a lot of anxiety that manifested as pain and tightness during the appointment. It wasn’t totally unexpected — in the past I had been unable to use tampons, and actually was never able to use them/basically have anything inserted until after I became sexually active. My body just needed to get used to that whole deal.
Anyway, the gynecologist clearly didn’t believe me and thought I was being a drama queen when she tried to do the initial part with her fingers and I told her it hurt and that I physically could not ‘relax’ enough for her to get more than her fingertip in. S__he ended the appointment there, in a massive huff, and said — and I quote —__ ‘Well, I’ll write you a birth control prescription, but I have no idea how you’re going to have sex.’
Yeah… very professional and comforting. I cried the whole way home.”
title: “13 Awful Gyno Shaming Stories That Are All Too Relatable” ShowToc: true date: “2024-09-25” author: “Quentin Ruffin”
This week a Reddit user anonymously revealed her first experience at the gynecologist, at age 14. The woman, who goes by carlinha1289, says she visited the doctor to ask about a burning sensation she was experiencing. She knew it could be a sign of an STD, and wanted testing. Instead, she left the office in tears.
“I skipped school to go to my appointment and when I met the doctor I grabbed all the courage I could and answers his questions honestly,” she recounted. “‘I am 14, yes I am sexually active, no I do not use birth control, yes we do have unprotected sex.’"
That’s when the doctor gave her a stern look, and a rebuke she would never forget.
Carlinha says she ran out of the office crying, and did not return to a gynecologist for 7 years.
iStock
Stories like Carlinha’s are more than just cringe-worthy horror stories: they are deterrents for women seeking crucial health care.
Studies show that women — especially young women — use gynecologists for a variety of necessary functions. One study found a large percentage of teens use their OBGYN as a reproductive specialist, general practitioner, and even mental health counselor. An emotional connection with their gynecologist is proven to keep women coming back for these essential services.
But unfortunately, negative experiences like Carlinha’s are far too common. One survey conducted in Turkey found more than 80% of women felt emotional discomfort after a gynecological examination. The problem is even more prominent for LGBTQ women, many of whom believe that revealing their sexual orientation would hinder their care.
The most common words used to describe treatment for LGBTQ women were “adequate,” “variable,” and “poor.”
Revelist asked women about their own worst experiences at the gynecologist, from the strange to the down-right horrifying. Their answers revealed a concerning trend of doctors shaming their patients, for everything from their weight to their sexual history.
Revelist has reached out to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists for comment.
Below, see what the women had to say:
Welp she stopped what she was doing, turned, took off her glasses and looked me up and down and said ‘You’re not serious are you?’
I just stared at her and then she grabbed her stuff and left. I never felt so small in my life. After the appointment with the actual doc she wrote me a script for birth control and then she told my stepmom ‘because she should know what I was actually up to.’”
Well, I had a lot of anxiety that manifested as pain and tightness during the appointment. It wasn’t totally unexpected — in the past I had been unable to use tampons, and actually was never able to use them/basically have anything inserted until after I became sexually active. My body just needed to get used to that whole deal.
Anyway, the gynecologist clearly didn’t believe me and thought I was being a drama queen when she tried to do the initial part with her fingers and I told her it hurt and that I physically could not ‘relax’ enough for her to get more than her fingertip in. S__he ended the appointment there, in a massive huff, and said — and I quote —__ ‘Well, I’ll write you a birth control prescription, but I have no idea how you’re going to have sex.’
Yeah… very professional and comforting. I cried the whole way home.”
